![A Lover's [S]quarrel](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-F7mJcq3TBAA/UGkN-ftfO2I/AAAAAAAAAjA/acqwSti135I/s1600/header_2.png)
C- I just knew it would hit the fan when the news of Hurricane Sandy started filling the airwaves. Realizing that electricity and gas were going to be compromised due to a power grid collapse in the northeast, I had to tap into my most masculine qualities as a hunter/provider. Without causing any panic I started stock piling and taking all necessary precautions to bug in with my beautiful girlfriend. I wanted to ensure that she would feel comfortable and protected inside even though anything would be possible outside. Once the power went out, all my preparations became worthwhile. About a week later our electricity came back on and all was well.
M- Welp, at least I know now that it'll just be me, myself, and I for the apocalypse. Without batting an eyelash or budging from the couch, C responded with a reassuring Oh, okay to my A HURRICANE is coming! Not exactly the response I was looking for. Why wasn't he concerned? He must have a plan, I thought (I hoped). For weeks I urged him to buy batteries, bottles of water and canned food to get us through what was to come. And for weeks, he looked at me like I was foolish. That is, until the electricity finally went out (he says he was watching MSNBC when it happened but I'm pretty sure he was playing Playstation). It was at that moment that something in him snapped. Unfortunately that thing was his will to live. He laid down and closed his eyes as if the world had officially ended. But babe, I said in bewilderment, it's still daylight out... we still have time to go buy supplies before it gets dark. I couldn't tell you what he said to me in response. Everything that came out of his mouth at that point was incomprehensible. Gibberish like. If I didn't know better, I'd say it was dementia. I was losing him for sure. Pull yourself together!, I yelled. I tried everything I could to lift his spirits but my beating him in UNO seven times in a row did nothing for his morale. I even tried reminding him of all the doomsday tactics he had learned while religiously watching shows like Revolution and The Walking Dead. But nothing could motivate him. Thankfully we got our power and heat back after a week. He was one day shy of eating our pet goldfish, Wellington, for dinner. Wellington is made out of wood, by the way.
M- Welp, at least I know now that it'll just be me, myself, and I for the apocalypse. Without batting an eyelash or budging from the couch, C responded with a reassuring Oh, okay to my A HURRICANE is coming! Not exactly the response I was looking for. Why wasn't he concerned? He must have a plan, I thought (I hoped). For weeks I urged him to buy batteries, bottles of water and canned food to get us through what was to come. And for weeks, he looked at me like I was foolish. That is, until the electricity finally went out (he says he was watching MSNBC when it happened but I'm pretty sure he was playing Playstation). It was at that moment that something in him snapped. Unfortunately that thing was his will to live. He laid down and closed his eyes as if the world had officially ended. But babe, I said in bewilderment, it's still daylight out... we still have time to go buy supplies before it gets dark. I couldn't tell you what he said to me in response. Everything that came out of his mouth at that point was incomprehensible. Gibberish like. If I didn't know better, I'd say it was dementia. I was losing him for sure. Pull yourself together!, I yelled. I tried everything I could to lift his spirits but my beating him in UNO seven times in a row did nothing for his morale. I even tried reminding him of all the doomsday tactics he had learned while religiously watching shows like Revolution and The Walking Dead. But nothing could motivate him. Thankfully we got our power and heat back after a week. He was one day shy of eating our pet goldfish, Wellington, for dinner. Wellington is made out of wood, by the way.
Update: C has since spent hours watching Doomsday Preppers. I'm not sure what for.
*Our deepest thoughts and prayers go out to all who were seriously impacted by Hurricane Sandy.
